The Silver Sphinx

 

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but to understand that

something else is more important than fear.”

Roandir, Lereia's former teacher and confidant

 

 

Third Guild Day of Sacrilegion, 126 HR

Lereia closed the door behind Ambar after he had said goodbye and let her hand rest on the door handle for a moment. He had accepted her invitation to dinner this evening, which she had extended on the occasion of his Factol's Day the month before. She hadn't thought much of it at the time and - in her sometimes perhaps too naive manner - had invited her factol to her home. She well remembered how this had surprised and somewhat amused Naghûl and Morânia, and she had quickly realized that this kind of invitation might not have been quite in keeping with Sigilian etiquette. She had therefore apologized to him that evening and explained that she didn’t want to appear intrusive, but that she had learned in her monastery that a good meal and pleasant company were worth more than any material gift. Ambar had smiled politely and assured her that he had been pleased, albeit a little surprised. And that, after all, their meetings could be described as purely “professional”. Yet it had been clear that none of them were really believing that. For a second, he had been looking a little deeper into her eyes and this look had, admittedly, thrown her off course and caused a certain nervousness. She had always had a deep admiration for her factol and with the last few meetings she also felt closer to him. She was sure that she had hardly trusted anyone that much before. But now there was something else ... more ... Maybe it had been there for a while, but only now did she have the courage to think about it. Her last conversation with Sgillin might also be a reason for why she now dared to give in to her feelings. After the discussion in the garden of the Festhall, she had thought about her relationship with him and soon made a decision. Sgillin and she had had a long talk and she had ended their relationship. She hadn't been able to tell from his reaction whether it had been mutual or whether she had hurt him. But even though it had been a difficult decision, she had no doubt that it was the right one. Too much stood between them now, too much had happened and her feelings for him had changed.

Lereia now turned away from the door and began to clear the table, recalling the evening in her mind. At first, they had talked about the Day of Pain, which had taken place just recently. She had been very worried about her factol that day and relieved to find that he was reasonably well. This evening, only one arm was still bandaged and he had assured her that the Lady had been merciful with him. Whatever that might mean. She was secretly thankful that she didn't yet have to understand some of the weird things in this sometimes quite crazy city.

Lereia had been very happy that Ambar had obviously liked her meal. She had taken great pains to cook traditional dishes from her Eldath monastery, even if she had had to modify the ingredients a little here and there. As a starter, she had served fried rice with spring onions and roasted cashew nuts on a sweet chili sauce. For the main course, she had chosen ingredients from Tir na Og – tricha fillets stewed in white wine with vegetables, served with grated and fried potatoes. A very simple side dish that had been common in the monastery, as potatoes were low-priced and they had grown them themselves. But it was still her favorite side dish, which in her opinion went well with almost anything. For dessert, she had prepared fruit caramelized in honey, especially from Arborea.

They had also talked about their visit to Harbinger House during the meal. Lereia remembered it with growing unease, especially, of course, the encounter with Sougad Lawshredder. When she had looked into his eyes, fear had immediately spread inside her. A cold horror that wanted to force her to run away, a terror that threatened to seep into her entire being. His soul signature of dried blood, steel and black oak leaves had pierced her senses sharply, searing. Somehow, though, she had managed not to run away, to stay by Ambar's side and to withstand the encounter. But the icy grip of fear and madness still had a hold on her and had made it difficult to sleep during the first nights after this creepy meeting. She would not forget that fearsome hoarse laughter anytime soon, which had triggered a wave of pure horror. But on the other hand, she thought she had truly grasped the philosophy of the Godsmen for the first time. It had been a kind of trial for her, not to run away, but to face this situation and to grow from it. She had decided not to be hunted, not to be prey. On the one hand, that was not in her nature anyway. On the other hand, fate seemed to be guiding her, making her realize the importance of the information she had received in Harbinger House.

Their conversation that evening had also been of a more private nature than usual. Ambar had told her that he hadn't had any serious relationship in recent years. That there had been some short amorous affairs, of course, but he hadn't been able to find the right one. Probably, he had speculated, because he somehow feared that people would be more interested in him because of his office than for his own sake, for the person he really was. It had occurred to her at that moment that, if anything, she would more likely be put off by the office but would be interested in the man behind it - not because of but despite his factolship. And of course she had also blurted out that sentence. Sometimes Lereia thought that she lacked the wisdom of the monks when the tigress chose a rather impulsive and direct way of communicating. But Ambar hadn't seemed taken aback at that moment, but rather happy about the statement. Maybe because he sensed that she really meant it, without any ulterior motive.

However, she hadn't told Ambar that her relationship with Sgillin was over, even when he had asked about him. She didn’t want to talk about it yet, especially since they hadn't even told their friends about it. But now that Ambar had left, she felt an urgent desire to tell him soon. If she was honest with herself, she hoped for a certain reaction from him, even if she didn't really expect it. She doused the last candle in the kitchen and decided to tell Ambar about it at the next opportunity. Because if there was one thing she had learned that evening, it was that she felt drawn to her factol, irrevocably and more strongly than she had ever expected.

 

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written by Lereia's player, based on a shared role-playing evening